32 1/2 weeks pregnant...

A very fun and unique addition to more traditional belly shots!







Pre-Natal Art by Kristal Yee
www.kristalyee.com/fpbt

Photography by Reinier deSmit
http://www.brillianteye.ca/

Holy contractions batman!

So, I don't know if any of you have ever heard of this evil, vicious man named John Braxton Hicks who left behind even more awefulness called "Braxton Hicks Contractions"?

Well, I guess I'm kidding. At least, I'm mostly kidding. What I mean is, he didn't leave them behind per se... but he did "first describe them" according to Wikipedia. My opinion is... as a Doctor, do you really want to associate yourself with something so irritating for all of eternity?!

WIKI says : "Braxton Hicks contractions, also known as false labor or practice contractions are sporadic uterine contractions that usually start around 6 weeks however are not usually felt until the second trimester or third trimester of pregnancy." Ultimately, that means... they suck. I went to my pre-natal class at 32 weeks with a girl who had started feeling them at 18 weeks, (ugh). I didn't know WHAT I was feeling until I was about 30 weeks and had one in front of my doctor. She was like "Oh wow dear... so have you been having lots of these Braxton Hicks?' And I was like... "Huh?" Then suddenly I was like... "Ohhhhh..... right. Those things. Yeah, I was reading about those in my weekly pregnancy calendar... man, is THAT what this is??"

See, it feels just like a Charley-Horse... in your belly. Over & over & over again. Sometimes it's just enough to make you stop and scrunch up your nose and maybe catch your breath... sometimes it can double you over completely in discomfort, but almost all of the time it's aggravating enough to make you hobble to the bathroom in a panic to pee. I just assumed that it was the baby pushing really hard against my belly in a few random spots, but as soon as I knew what it was that I was experiencing, I was able to diagnose them, and even anticipate them starting.

WIKI says: "They should be infrequent, irregular, and involve only mild cramping. Braxton Hicks contractions are a tightening of the uterine muscles for one to two hours and are thought to be an aid to the body in its preparation for birth. Not all expectant mothers have these contractions. They are thought to be part of the process of effacement of the cervix." Guess I'm part of the lucky few who get to have them. Whoo hoo. At least I know that my stomach muscles are getting some exercise over these 10 months since I can't do P90X.

That said, I find that these f@#*ers occur whenever I cause my stomach muscles to flex. (And do you have ANY idea how often you inadvertently flex your stomach muscles in a day?!?!) You laugh. **flex** You're caught off guard. **flex** You sit up from lying down. **flex** You bend over to pick up dog poo. **flex** You have to take your own poo... you guessed it! **flex** (classy shit this whole pregnancy thing huh? ;p) So, I get them a few times an hour. That seems extreme to me, but nobody else seems to bat an eyelash.

Anyhow, now that I'm 36 weeks preggo in a matter of hours, I'm going to stop questioning things out loud. Especially after experiencing some weird tummy cramps today that I would have sworn were the start of labor if it weren't for my pre-natal classes and the internet-- it seems that anything I wonder about or google about simply states that my body is "preparing" for the "real thing". I swear I could be in actual labor and sources would say "well ladies, that's just your body prepping itself for motherhood." No shit.

Soo, I count down the weeks, the days. And if I make it to May 15 & am still blogging about f'n Braxton Hicks contractions instead of having the real thing, I will be hitting some serious inducement strategies.

Shower Etiquette...

When I told my husband that I was going to have a bunch of girls over for a shower, he thought this whole pregnancy thing had finally taken a turn for the better! "NIIIICE.... what night?!" BUT, when I then explained what kind of a shower I meant, he simply shrugged and turned back to his computer.

A guy can have his fantasies I guess... ;p

Baby Showers.

Who do you invite? Just women? Just women and maybe a few select couples? Just family? Just friends? Just close family? Just close friends? What about work friends? Do co-workers count as friends?

Well, for the sake of simplicity, let's just say we choose to go the "all girl" route. Do you invite every female you know / are related to / are associated with in life and risk looking greedy? Risk looking like you're running some popularity contest or are just inviting as many people as possible so that you'll be 'showered' with gifts? OR, do you go the opposite route. Maybe you're more selective about who you invite, thinking that you're doing everyone else a favor, and then you face the inevitable ego-bruising?

See, as the pregnant woman you think: "Maybe I don't know them well enough..." or "They wouldn't be interested in coming anyway..." or "They live so far away..." or "I just don't want to impose on anybody!" and as the uninvited guest, they're like: "It's not like I haven't known her for 2 years or anything..." or "I guess she just doesn't care that I'm interested in her baby's future..." or "It's not like I don't drive to Vancouver all the time..." or "I guess she just doesn't want me to be there."

Maybe all of the above are extremes, and there is some happy balance that I'm missing and other woman find? But I would imagine that 'to-get-or-not-to-get' an invitation will undoubtedly ruffle feathers no matter what the choice.


BUT, I've come to this... and I think it covers all bases:

* You are all welcome to come to my baby shower.
* You are all also welcome NOT to come to my baby shower.
* You are not obligated to bring 'gifts'. It would just be really cool to spend the afternoon catching up and introducing my worlds to each other.
* Gifts, however, will not be frowned upon as we are trying to spend as little / save as much money as we can.
* We would really prefer to get your hand-me-downs as gifts... collections from your friends' friends... purchases from Craigslist... items on a year or two loan etc. Let's take the environment and economy into consideration shall we? Second hand clothes and toys function just as well, are already doing their damage to the earth and are 1/2 the price to buy!
* For those of you who insist on buying all things *new* however, we are going to be registering a few of the bigger/ more specific & personal things at Babies 'R' Us and Walmart. (Maybe if they're pricey you can team up with a few other party-goers for these items?)
* AND, if you're at a complete loss, insist on the 'gift-thing' but don't want to risk doubling up on a purchase, cash or gift cards of any denomination ($5, $10, $20) will help us buy diapers and supplies later in the year. Costco / Walmart / Babies 'R' Us would be our first three choices for store gift cards.

(PS: If you are male and want to come to the shower, please let me know... I am not opposed to male attendees, but I think that Brad will be hosting a hockey-watching-beer-drinking-shower at the same time, so you may want to go to his instead!)

And that's that.

I hope to see you all / not see you all soon :) I don't have solidified dates of the two showers yet (both on the North Shore in April) but will keep you posted.

xo N

The difference 30 yrs in technology can make...

The first two pictures are ME at 27 weeks in my mom's belly!! (around Sept. 1979)

The next three ultrasound pictures are our baby Veronica at 28 weeks, Feb 20, 2010... we did the 3D Ultrasound at Sono Image in Coquitlam http://www.3dsonoimage.com/services.php
We will definitely be doing the 3D imaging again... what a difference, and well worth the $200 for 2 sessions!!

"AND THE GOLD MEDAL GOES TO...."

(... do they even announce the Olympic Gold Medal winners like they do at the Oscars? After almost 16 full days of watching the 2010 Winter Games, and 10 Canadian Gold medals, you'd think I would have noticed.) ;p


Every parent thinks that their child is destined for great things, so it will come as no big surprise when I say-- I SWEAR this little girl inside my belly is going to be an Olympic champion. "How can I tell", you ask? Well, from morning 'til night, she's punching and kicking, doing stomach crunches, leg raises, bicep curls...with all the moving around she's doing, she's bound to be one fit little baby!!

According to my Pregnancy Calendar, after 28 weeks I'm supposed to check in with my belly every morning and evening and count 'baby movements'. If I don't feel about 10 movements in an hour, I'm supposed to drink juice or eat a sugary snack and try again... If THAT fails, then I'm to contact my practitioner to get a checkup and make sure everything is alright. (Yet another way these books and doctors try to freak out expectant mothers...)

However, what they DON'T give advice on, is how to function when you're being karate-chopped from the inside 24/7! "10 movements in an hour" Pregnancy Calendar?? How about 10 movements every 10 seconds! Especially at bedtime.


They say that the average woman starts feeling baby move between 18-22 weeks. If you've had a baby before, or you're really skinny, you'll feel movement around 18 weeks... well at 21 1/2 weeks when i STILL hadn't felt anything, I was getting a little anxious. "Umm.. how do you know if your baby's still alive?" I would ask my husband. And his face would go pale.

Then one day at work when I was around 22 weeks I felt it. Was it just paranoia setting in? Or maybe just gas bubbles after lunch? Nope. Within a few hours I felt it again, and then again later that night after dinner. Like little fingers rapping along the inside of my belly. I consulted my Urban Encyclopedia (aka 'Facebook') and all sources were agreed--- that was baby moving. Whew! Thanks Facebook doctors. She was alive and well, and I fell into that 18-22 week statistic. (Sometimes it's really OK just to be average.)

And now at 29 weeks, I realize it's been an Olympic party in there ever since! Maybe it's because now I know what it feels like so I am more aware? Maybe baby's getting bigger and stronger and simply moving around more in there? Maybe it's a combination of both, but either way, it's comforting to know that whenever I feel any movement -- it's good movement... even if that means she punches my bladder at 4am and makes me pee 7 times a night.


So, like I said... if there's going to be a future Olympic Gold Medal winner, it's my little girl. After all, she'll be born in 2010, so that has to bless her with all things athletic. :)

(By the way... is being a "Ninja" an Olympic Sport yet? If not, it should be... hmmm... maybe little Veronica here will put it on the map.)

Happy birthday to my mom... in loving memory..

Well,

My kids will never know the beautiful soul that was my mother, but that doesn't mean that they shouldn't share in our memories of her... this is a slideshow I made for my mom's funeral. miss you mom.

THIS IS HALF YOUR FAULT!

I have joked since Day One of discovering I was pregnant that I was going to write a book called “This is Half Your Fault!” focusing on the ‘joys’ of marriage and relationships during the 10 loooong months of pregnancy… but the likelihood of that actually happening is pretty low for 2 solid reasons:

a) I don’t think I have the attention span to actually write a book;

and

b) Other than a catchy title, I don’t think I have much material to fill the pages!

Now, I don't know how most of you ladies feel out there, but I really have to hand it to my husband. Apart from some bumpy transitional times during the first trimester where we just wished we could go back to the way things were, Brad has really jumped onboard and has been amazing throughout this crazy new stage in our lives. He's been supportive & understanding of my various mood swings -- he caters to my random food cravings, (like running to 7-11 at 10pm if I decide that I REALLY need some fuzzy peaches or Rolo ice cream), and most of all he's managed to cope with my lack of 'libido'....

(Wow girls.. Ready to get pregnant now or what?!) ;p

The Backstory…

Even before we were married or ready to have kids, Brad and I talked about what would happen if we ever got pregnant: Would we keep it? Yes. No brainer. How would we afford it? Well, we just would... "Let's try our best to wait until we're in our 30's.." That was our only goal. (And we succeeded at that!)

We talked about what we thought the most challenging parts of pregnancy were going to be… (and if you’ve read any of my previous posts, you can probably guess that I wasn’t thinking about the miracle-of-life that is conception)… no… I was focusing on all the drugs I’d need because I’m terrified about the pain I will feel during labor… and I was wondering how the hell I was going to get through 9-10 months of pregnancy with no wine!!

We had long talks about parenthood. What does it mean to be a 'parent'. We talked about my upbringing, his upbringing, our morals, our views on disciplining... We were relieved to discover that neither of us have a desire to introduce religion to our kids at birth, ( even though I was raised Catholic, my parents gave my brother and I the choice to continue practicing at age 13 and we both chose not to.) Our kids, too, will be free to make decisions about religion if and when they're ready.

We were confident that we'd both be accepting of any life choices that our kids made (and were pretty sure up until our ultrasound that our first child was going to be an awesomely gay son-- ah well, we may luck out with #2!) We're STILL convinced that our kids will probably be accountants or scientists or something else that we artists can't relate to. But all we can do is teach our children about love and give them the best tools possible for them to survive... (and then we'll do what our parents did... keep our fingers crossed that what we were able to give them was enough!)

We will expose our children to the world. Focus on the things that are truly important. Passion. Education. Culture. Wisdom. We'll teach them about food and nutrition, and introduce them to various activities and hobbies and styles of music and arts and sports and people. We'll start them young going to see live theatre and eating out in restaurants. They'll grow up on sushi and pad thai and spicy Indian curry and hopefully by growing up in multi-cultural Vancouver (even though they'll be raised by two whiter-than-white parents) they'll never even need to know about being color blind.

(By the way, on a total side note, have you ever googled the definition of "Parent"? One pretty traditionally says: "PARENT: One who begets, gives birth to, or nurtures and raises a child; a father or mother." But another one says: "PARENT: An organism that produces or generates offspring."

An 'organism' huh? Wow. I feel so... ordinary.

What happened… (The Pregnancy Part)

So, we agreed early on in our relationship that if the whole pregnancy thing ever happened that Brad would give up booze too. (Fair is fair, right?) A ten month detox. Besides… a girl can’t get preggers on her own, it takes 2 to tango…

As I've said in other posts, I found out that I was pregnant in September 2009... right after Brad & I had our last financially irresponsible summer of being DINK’s… (Dual Income, No Kids)… lounging on patios with our two puppies and amazing friends, racking up hundreds of dollars in bar tabs...

And then, WHAM. Bye-bye summer of freedom, it's detox time. Easier said and done for me than for Brad, that's for sure... I was feeling so crappy that even the smell of wine was enough to make my tummy turn. But he was a trooper. There were moments for sure during the first trimester where I was so intolerably grumpy that he probably wished he could drown himself in a case of beer... I remember one particularly irritable day I told him to either start drinking again or go back to work shooting movies on the island, because we were actually happier that way.

Ahh love. ;p

So I've covered our views on parenting and mood swings and food cravings and what happens when two people lack a 'vice'.... so now, for a brief moment I will talk about my "libido" (or the lack-thereof). **Sorry to my future children who may be reading this... You may want to skip this paragraph!** I have done much research in this area, and it simply seems that it's absolutely inconclusive. It's just different for every woman. Some women experience an increase in sexual interest and activity during their second and third trimesters, and some women don't. The only consistent thing seems to be that if you're feeling sick and tired during the first trimester, you likely will not be in the mood for intimacy. No kidding. You mean, puking isn't a turn on for most people?! But it seems that MY 'mood' just hasn't picked back up again yet... but I suppose there's still time!

OK. That's all I'll get into about that. I don't want to embarrass anybody.

All in all, my reason behind this whole blog was to give kudos to my hubby. He's really been picking up the falling pieces during this whole pregnancy thing.

So Bradley… it's true. This IS half your fault! And thanks, sweetie, for taking on your 50%.

xox

(P.S: I'll have to keep you all posted on the "What Happened... The Birth Part" and "What Happened... The Breast Feeding Part". We'll see if I still feel this way after giving birth to a watermelon and having a creature tug at my once-upon-a-time-sexy-female assets!! ;p)